I Like You, I Love Her_A Novel by J. R. Rogue

Author:J. R. Rogue [Rogue, J. R.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Rogue Books
Published: 2018-09-26T16:00:00+00:00

Eighteen

I'M SORRY I KISSED YOU

THEN

Two Mondays after homecoming, I saw them. Aurora and Bryan. Hands intertwined, lips pressed together before class. My heart broke. I broke. I was so good at keeping it all in, though.

The proof was in the way my eyes never swayed. The way I avoided Bryan’s face in class. The way I stared at my feet when he passed me in the hall.

I could feel his eyes on me. I could feel a reaching out. He wanted me to look up. He wanted something from me, but I wouldn’t give in. I confessed my assumptions to my friends at lunch one day, when the bubbling over felt too loud.

“He keeps staring at me, right? I can feel it. Maybe I’m making it up.” I gripped my tray with my left hand, stirred my runny mashed potatoes aggressively with my right.

“He keeps looking at you. Like, these little bullshit glances. When his face isn’t attached to Aurora’s.” Britt sounded bitter, carrying my rage, my heartbroken humming.

“Okay, so at least we know I’m not insane.”

“Debatable.” Christina nudged me, trying to cheer me up.

I’d been a downer since homecoming. I didn’t want to talk on the phone, and I didn’t talk in the halls. I carried my broken heart around, heavy on my shoulders. I wrote poetry until late at night. My father would rap his knuckles on my door, ordering me to turn my lamp off.

The bags under my eyes were dark, unbecoming. I needed to snap out of it. This was a silly high school love. I didn’t get the boy. It happens all the time, and it’s not a tragedy. I reminded myself of these things every day.

“This isn’t a tragedy,” I mumbled, pulling my eyes from my mess of food.

“No. It’s not. He’s a stupid fucking boy. And he picked the wrong girl,” Christina said confidently.

I shook my head. “It was never a choice. Remember, he didn’t like me. He was just being polite.”

“I don’t believe that. You don't jam your tongue down someone's throat to be polite." Britt propped her head on her hand, glanced Bryan’s way. “He acted so freaking weird around you. And when he picked you up that night, just to make sure you knew he wasn’t going to be a caveman and slap your ass. Then the dancing at homecoming!”

I held my hands up, halting her. “We can’t go down this road again. Trust me, I do this in my head every damn day. I am so tired of overanalyzing it all.”

“Chapter closed?” Christina grabbed her boxed milk and held it to the center of the table. We all grabbed ours, toasted to the decision. A chapter closed.

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